8 Grief Poems for Saying Goodbye
We selected these famous poems for their ability to capture the complex emotions of loss and goodbye. They express the pain of separation, the longing for connection, and the hope for new beginnings.
1) Nothing Gold Can Stay by Robert Frost
Nature’s first green is gold,
Her hardest hue to hold.
Her early leaf’s a flower;
But only so an hour.
Then leaf subsides to leaf.
So Eden sank to grief,
So dawn goes down to day.
Nothing gold can stay.
2) Talking to Grief by Denise Levertov
Ah, Grief, I should not treat you
like a homeless dog
who comes to the back door
for a crust, for a meatless bone.
I should trust you.
I should coax you
into the house and give you
your own corner,
a worn mat to lie on,
your own water dish.
You think I don’t know you’ve been living
under my porch.
You long for your real place to be readied
before winter comes. You need
your name,
your collar and tag. You need
the right to warn off intruders,
to consider
my house your own
and me your person
and yourself
my own dog.
3) Funeral Blues by W.H. Auden
Stop all the clocks, cut off the telephone,
Prevent the dog from barking with a juicy bone,
Silence the pianos and with muffled drum
Bring out the coffin, let the mourners come.
Let aeroplanes circle moaning overhead
Scribbling on the sky the message ‘He is Dead’.
Put crepe bows round the white necks of the public doves,
Let the traffic policemen wear black cotton gloves.
He was my North, my South, my East and West,
My working week and my Sunday rest,
My noon, my midnight, my talk, my song;
I thought that love would last forever: I was wrong.
The stars are not wanted now; put out every one,
Pack up the moon and dismantle the sun,
Pour away the ocean and sweep up the wood;
For nothing now can ever come to any good.
4) Separation by W.S. Merwin
Your absence has gone through me
Like thread through a needle.
Everything I do is stitched with its color.
5) Making a Fist By Naomi Shihab Nye
For the first time, on the road north of Tampico,
I felt the life sliding out of me,
a drum in the desert, harder and harder to hear.
I was seven, I lay in the car
watching palm trees swirl a sickening pattern past the glass.
My stomach was a melon split wide inside my skin.
“How do you know if you are going to die?”
I begged my mother.
We had been traveling for days.
With strange confidence she answered,
“When you can no longer make a fist.”
Years later I smile to think of that journey,
the borders we must cross separately,
stamped with our unanswerable woes.
I who did not die, who am still living,
still lying in the backseat behind all my questions,
clenching and opening one small hand.
6) The Dying Child By John Clare
He could not die when trees were green,
For he loved the time too well.
His little hands, when flowers were seen,
Were held for the bluebell,
As he was carried o’er the green.
His eye glanced at the white-nosed bee;
He knew those children of the spring:
When he was well and on the lea
He held one in his hands to sing,
Which filled his heart with glee.
Infants, the children of the spring!
How can an infant die
When butterflies are on the wing,
Green grass, and such a sky?
How can they die at spring?
He held his hands for daisies white,
And then for violets blue,
And took them all to bed at night
That in the green fields grew,
As childhood’s sweet delight.
And then he shut his little eyes,
And flowers would notice not;
Birds’ nests and eggs caused no surprise,
He now no blossoms got;
They met with plaintive sighs.
When winter came and blasts did sigh,
And bare were plain and tree,
As he for ease in bed did lie
His soul seemed with the free,
He died so quietly.
7) A Daughter of Eve By Christina Rossetti
A fool I was to sleep at noon,
And wake when night is chilly
Beneath the comfortless cold moon;
A fool to pluck my rose too soon,
A fool to snap my lily.
My garden-plot I have not kept;
Faded and all-forsaken,
I weep as I have never wept:
Oh it was summer when I slept,
It’s winter now I waken.
Talk what you please of future spring
And sun-warm’d sweet to-morrow:—
Stripp’d bare of hope and everything,
No more to laugh, no more to sing,
I sit alone with sorrow.
8) Robin’s Egg by Keith Leonard
This blue-green robin’s egg
cracked, now, and left
in the porch nest—impossibly
light in my palm. Somehow
the chick knew to press its beak
against the egg’s surrounding walls.
In darkness, it must have followed
sound—the thunder clap,
its mother’s song, the dog—each
driving its first and final fissure
of the shell. But how did it trust
that leaving one world would,
in fact, reveal another? I listen
to the wind and hear
only wind.
Poems – Grieving the Death of a Friend
Poetry validates, expresses, and helps process the complex grief of losing a close friend. Through creative metaphors, rhyme, and rhythm, friendship elegies immortalize cherished bonds, release emotions, find meaning, and encourage closure while evoking how these unique connections transcend death and live on in our hearts.
Poetry validates, expresses, and helps process the complex grief of losing a close friend. Through creative metaphors, rhyme, and rhythm, friendship elegies immortalize cherished bonds, release emotions, find meaning, and encourage closure while evoking how these special connections transcend death and live on in our hearts.
- Do Not Stand at My Grave and Weep” by Mary Elizabeth Frye – This soothing poem resonates with me in my moments of grief as it depicts death as an end and a transformation. It comforts me that my departed friend’s spirit endures in nature and my heart. This perspective on death helps to soothe my sorrow, inviting me to feel their presence in the world surrounding me.
- “Death Be Not Proud” by John Donne – In my struggle with grief, Donne’s defiant sonnet offers a unique perspective on death, challenging its fear-inducing reputation. This bold portrayal of death as an essential part of life rather than a terrifying end helps to soften my grief. It provides a path toward accepting death as a natural, albeit painful, part of the human experience.
- “When Great Trees Fall” by Maya Angelou – Angelou’s poignant verse is a balm for my grieving soul, capturing the chaos and pain that ensue from loss. The poem likens my feelings of shock and grief to the aftermath of a great tree’s fall. However, it assures me that with time, the love and memories of my friend will heal and comfort me, bringing me peace and acceptance.
- “Remember” by Christina Rossetti – As I grieve my friend’s passing, Rossetti’s serene sonnet helps to lighten my heart. Her tranquil depiction of death encourages me to cherish my friend’s memory, while not allowing sorrow to overshadow my life. It nudges me to honor them by living my life to the fullest, just as they would have wanted.
- “Separation” by W.S. Merwin – Amidst my grief, this poem is a poignant reminder of the enduring impact of my friend’s presence despite their physical absence. Merwin’s poem comforts my grieving heart by reinforcing that while I’ve lost them in the physical world, the memories, influence, and love we shared are here to stay.
Poems – Grieving the Death of Spouse/Partner
Poems about losing a loved one, like a spouse or partner, can help when I’m overwhelmed by grief. They put words to my feelings when I can’t, which helps me understand my emotions better. They remind me that my feelings are normal and that I’m not alone in this experience. These poems also show different ways to look at loss and can guide me toward healing. And importantly, they help me remember and honor the person I lost.
- “One Art” by Elizabeth Bishop – This villanelle, famous for its repetitive structure, explores loss and the pain of missing a loved one. Reading it can validate how grief comes in waves.
- I” Carry Your Heart With Me(i carry it in)” by E.E. Cummings – The beautiful metaphor of carrying the lost loved one in your heart captures how bonds can endure past death.
- “He Is Gone” by David Harkins – Reflecting on happy memories and the mark left on the world can bring consolation. This poem emphasizes that legacy.
- “Sonnet 10: Death, Be Not Proud” by John Donne – Donne’s famous defiant sonnet reminds us death does not have the final say over enduring love.
- “Longing” by Matthew Arnold – This poem’s raw emotion and deep longing voice the profound emptiness after losing a life partner.
Poems – Grieving the Death Of a Child
Grief poetry’s raw and piercing words validate the depth of anguish that comes with child loss, reminding the bereaved they are not alone. Slowly, the metaphors, rhythms, and images provide an emotional outlet to begin processing devastating feelings.
Grief poetry’s raw and piercing words validate the depth of anguish that comes with child loss, reminding the bereaved they are not alone. Slowly, the metaphors, rhythms, and images provide an emotional outlet to begin processing devastating feelings.
Over time, elegies shift to honor memories, reveal meaning, and build community. Themes emerge of resilience, enduring bonds, and quiet integration of loss. While the pain never disappears, poetry gives language to make sense of the unimaginable. Gradually, those words ease the ache by encouraging acceptance, connection, remembrance, and hope.
Bit by bit, poems provide a path where, while the grief remains, the pain lessens through empathy, meaning, and the power of honoring enduring love.
- On My First Son” by Ben Jonson – Jonson’s poem, written after the death of his son, validates the deep grief and heartache experienced by his parents. The poem can help grieving parents feel seen and understood by articulating this intense sorrow, providing some comfort in shared emotion.
- “Little Boy Blue” by Eugene Field – This touching poem is a poignant tribute to a lost child. It can help those grieving to remember and honor their child, allowing them to express their love and keep the memory of their child alive.
- “Surprised by Joy” by William Wordsworth – Wordsworth’s poem captures the sudden, sharp pain of grief that can come unbidden, even in moments of joy. This acknowledgment can help grieving parents feel understood in their complex emotional journey.
- “A Child of Mine” by Edgar Guest – Guest’s poem provides comfort by suggesting that children are only lent to us for a while. This perspective can bring solace to grieving parents, reminding them of the privilege of the time they had with their child.
- “Resignation” by Charles Dickens – Dickens’s poem expresses the pain of losing a child while offering comfort in the belief of an afterlife. For those who share this belief, the poem can provide solace and hope amid grief.
Poems – Grieving the Death Of a Mother
The loss of a mother is a profound and deeply personal experience that can often be hard to articulate. The following list of poems explores this complex journey of grief, providing a sense of solace, understanding, and companionship. These verses acknowledge the depth of sorrow, pay tribute to the irreplaceable role of a mother, and shine a light on the legacy she leaves behind.
Whether you find comfort in their shared sentiment or catharsis in their poignant words, these poems aim to support you in your journey through grief and toward healing.
- “Surprised by Joy” by William – Wordsworth Wordsworth’s poem can help individuals grieving a mother’s loss feel seen and understood, validating their ongoing sense of loss in everyday moments.
- “My Mother’s Body” by Marge Piercy This poem is a comforting reminder of a mother’s enduring influence and love, aiding in the- healing process by honoring cherished memories.
- “Because I Could Not Stop for Death” by Emily Dickinson – Dickinson’s serene perspective on death can provide solace to those grieving, helping frame death as a part of life’s journey and offering comfort.
- “Mother’s Loss” by Ella Wheeler Wilcox – Wilcox’s poem acknowledges the sorrow and void left by a mother’s loss, offering understanding and validation for those experiencing similar grief.
- “The Courage That My Mother Had” by Edna St. Vincent Millay – This tribute to a mother’s enduring strength is an inspirational reminder of the legacy left behind, helping those in grief navigate their healing journey.
Poems – Grieving the Death Of a Father
In navigating the complex landscape of grief, I’ve found profound solace in these specially selected poems. Each touches on different aspects of the grieving process, articulating the depth of loss, validating the spectrum of emotions, and encouraging healing. As I immerse myself in these verses, I feel a shared understanding, a sense of companionship that eases the solitude of grief.
In navigating the complex landscape of grief, I’ve found profound solace in these specially selected poems. Each touches on different aspects of the grieving process, articulating the depth of loss, validating the spectrum of emotions, and encouraging healing. As I immerse myself in these verses, I feel a shared understanding, a sense of companionship that eases the solitude of grief.
I believe these poems can serve as gentle guides for anyone experiencing the loss of a father, offering comfort and helping them honor and cherish the enduring legacy of a loved one’s life.
- “Elegy for My Father, Who Is Not Dead” by Andrew Hudgins – Hudgins’ poem explores the anticipation of loss and the struggle of letting go. This can help those who lost their father articulate and validate complex emotions, aiding in the grief process.
- “My Father” by Yehuda Amichai – This poem pays a beautiful tribute to the memory of a father. Its focus on personal remembrance can help those grieving to honor their father’s legacy and cherish their shared experiences, promoting healing.
- “The Gift” by Li-Young Lee – Lee’s poem speaks of a father’s love, expressed in small, everyday moments. For those mourning the loss of a father, it can serve as a gentle reminder of the enduring bond and the lasting impact of these shared moments.
- “Those Winter Sundays” by Robert Hayden – Hayden’s poem honors a father’s silent sacrifices, highlighting the depth of paternal love. This can help those grieving a father’s loss feel a continued sense of closeness and appreciation, aiding in their journey through grief.
- “Father” by Edgar Albert Guest – Guest’s poem beautifully encapsulates a father’s countless sacrifices for his children. Reading it, I’m reminded of the enduring love and guidance my father offered me, which allows me to honor his memory and find comfort in my cherished memories, supporting my journey through grief.
Types of Grief Poems
Elegy: An elegy is a poem that mourns the death of a loved one. It often expresses feelings of sadness, loss, and longing.
- “In Memory of W.B. Yeats” by W.H. Auden: Auden’s moving tribute to Yeats demonstrates to me the timeless nature of an elegy, capturing the mourning of a respected poet and the legacy he left behind.
- “Elegy for Jane” by Theodore Roethke: As I read this poem, Roethke’s tender reminiscence of his student, Jane, defines it as an elegy, expressing personal grief and the painful beauty of youthful potential cut short.
- “Elegy Written in a Country Churchyard” by Thomas Gray: To me, Gray’s contemplative lines on the death of common folk profoundly capture the spirit of an elegy, highlighting the universality of mortality and the equalizing nature of death.
- “O Captain! My Captain!” by Walt Whitman: I see Whitman’s mournful tribute to Abraham Lincoln as a quintessential elegy, giving voice to a nation’s grief and the tragedy of a great leader’s fall.
- “A Refusal to Mourn the Death, by Fire, of a Child in London” by Dylan Thomas: In my perspective, Thomas’s poem is an unconventional elegy, where he refuses traditional mourning rituals, illuminating raw and complex grief.
Lament: A lament is a poem that expresses grief or sorrow. It often uses vivid language and imagery to describe the pain of loss.
- “When Lilacs Last in the Dooryard Bloom’d” by Walt Whitman: In my eyes, Whitman’s poignant homage to Abraham Lincoln encapsulates the shared sorrow of a nation, defining it as a classic lament.
- “Lament for the Dorsets” by Al Purdy: I view this poem as a mournful ode to the extinct Dorset culture, it gives voice to the collective grief over lost civilizations.
- “The Wanderer” by Anonymous: To me, this ancient English poem profoundly expresses the lament of an exiled man, capturing the despair and yearning characteristic of a lament.
- “The Lamentation of Old Women” by Anna Akhmatova: I see this poem as a piercing lament, where Akhmatova unveils the universal sorrow of mothers losing their sons to war.
- “The Wife’s Lament” by Anonymous: This old English poem, in my perspective, powerfully conveys a wife’s grief and longing for her absent husband, aptly fitting the form of a lament.
In Memoriam: An in memoriam poem is a poem that is written in memory of a loved one who has died. It often celebrates the deceased’s life and expresses gratitude for their time with the poet.
- “In Memoriam A.H.H.” by Alfred Lord Tennyson: Tennyson’s lengthy and heartfelt tribute to his close friend, Arthur Henry Hallam, strikes me as a profound journey through grief, demonstrating the power of love and memory in shaping our lives.
- “Memorial for the City” by Adrienne Rich: This poem acts as a eulogy for a city changed by time, and to me, it encapsulates the collective grief experienced by its inhabitants.
- “Memorial Verses” by Matthew Arnold: Arnold’s sincere tribute to the authors Goethe and Wordsworth makes me reflect on the impact that others, even those we’ve not met personally, can have on our lives and how we mourn their loss.
- “Requiem” by Anna Akhmatova: Akhmatova’s extensive elegy commemorating the victims of political repression in Russia strikes me as a powerful testament to collective memory and grief.
- “Elegy for Jane” by Theodore Roethke: Roethke’s tribute to his student, Jane, deeply moves me as it expresses the grief of an unexpected loss and the enduring imprint left by those who depart too soon.
Anticipatory Grief: Anticipatory grief is grief that is felt before the death of a loved one. It is often experienced by people caring for a dying loved one.
- “Because I could not stop for Death” by Emily Dickinson: In this poem, Dickinson personifies Death as a kind gentleman, signaling the inevitability of mortality and causing me to anticipate and reflect on my demise.
- “Do not go gentle into that good night” by Dylan Thomas: Thomas’s plea to his dying father to resist the quiet of death encourages me to face and anticipate the grief associated with impending loss.
- “Sonnet 71” by William Shakespeare: Shakespeare’s contemplation of his own death and how it will affect his beloved is a poignant anticipation of grief from both sides—the dying and the one to be left behind.
- “Tithonus” by Alfred Lord Tennyson: Tennyson’s exploration of the mythological Tithonus, who has eternal life but not eternal youth, makes me confront the painful reality of aging and the anticipation of death.
- “An Elegy for My Father’s Father” by James K. Baxter: Baxter’s reflection on his grandfather’s life and death prompts me to consider the cycle of life and death, bringing anticipation of grief.
Recovery: Recovery poems explore the process of healing from grief. They often offer hope and encouragement to those who are still grieving.
- “Healing” by Danna Faulds: This poem, full of hope and resilience, walks me through the recovery journey from grief, emphasizing that time and love can heal wounds.
- “Surprised by Joy” by William Wordsworth: While Wordsworth captures the pain of missing a loved one, he also expresses a moment of unexpected happiness, suggesting that joy can return after loss.
- “Hope is the Thing with Feathers” by Emily Dickinson: Dickinson’s poem, personifying hope as a bird, reminds me that hope can persist even through the most challenging grief.
- “If You See a Comet” by Haley Morgan: In this poem, the appearance of a comet serves as a symbol of light and hope after the storm, illustrating that life and beauty continue after a loss.
- “One Art” by Elizabeth Bishop: Bishop’s poem teaches me that it’s possible to practice losing and surviving it, suggesting that recovery and resilience are part of life’s journey.
Author’s Note:
When my Grandfather died, I was overwhelmed with grief that I didn’t know what to do. Months later, I read the poem “Grief” by Maya Angelou. It helped me understand that grief is a natural part of life and a sign that we have loved someone deeply.
I now find comfort in the quote, “Grief is the price we pay for love.” While the pain of loss still lingers, I am grateful for the many happy memories that will forever be cherished in my heart.
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